These past few days, life has been a roller coaster for me. I've been through all the joys and pains and yet I'm still here, keeping my heart beating, surviving these crazy life of mine. I tried to ponder why I've been feeling miserable, weak and hopeless these days, I've tried crying it out yet no tears will fall, i tried to laugh it all out but still there's no sign that I can be happy at all. My emotions were ambivalent, I can't figure the reasons that made me so down, i thought I'm going crazy, I thought I'm just being so silly and sensitive but deep down in me, I know there's something wrong. Stress in work, stress at home, stress surrounds me everywhere I go, it keeps pulling my sanity, it makes me feeble and suicidal!!!
Today, I took a quiz from "http://www.gotoquiz.com/results/how_suicidical_are_you"
and the test result shows: >You are 91% Suicidical
Yes, I guess, I am depressed and suicidal. I guess, I have the ability and strength to take the life out of me but I still believe that I also have the courage to refuse these kind of doing for I was born to fear my God! I just hope and pray that I'll be strong enough to stay alive and be happy with what I have now.
For the mean time, I am trying to get rid of these mixed emotions in me, I'm planning to run away from all these pain and reflect on the beauty of life!!!
Somebody has told me that "If people don't see how great I am, then THEY'RE stupid, not me!!" and I think she's right, so I won't let them sabotage my life!!!
***photo courtesy of: http://www.flickr.com/photos/doc18/61461873/....thanks 4 d pix